I’m going to so something slightly different today. I’m going to read the passage of scripture very slowly and as I do that I want you to listen for the things that speak directly to you. But before we do that I want you to take just a moment to notice what you’re feeling and what’s on your mind today. What circumstances do you find yourself in? Is life kind of breezing along and you’re feeling happy and content? Maybe you’re in a difficult situation and you’re feeling sad or afraid or overwhelmed. Whatever the case, just take note of it. I’m going to give you just a few moments to notice those things…
Now, as I read this passage, listen from the place you find yourself and notice what stands out to you. What speaks to you from this story? Is there an invitation from the Holy Spirit for you?
Luke 5:1-11
Once while Jesus was standing beside the lake of Gennesaret, and the crowd was pressing in on him to hear the word of God, he saw two boats there at the shore of the lake; the fishermen had gone out of them and were washing their nets. He got into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, and asked him to put out a little way from the shore. Then he sat down and taught the crowds from the boat. When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into the deep water and let down your nets for a catch.” Simon answered, “Master, we have worked all night long but have caught nothing. Yet if you say so, I will let down the nets.” When they had done this, they caught so many fish that their nets were beginning to break. So they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them. And they came and filled both boats, so that they began to sink. But when Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, “Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!” For he and all who were with him were amazed at the catch of fish that they had taken; and so also were James and John, sons of Zebedee, who were partners with Simon. Then Jesus said to Simon, “Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching people.” When they had brought their boats to shore, they left everything and followed him.
When I found myself scheduled to speak today, I thought to myself, “OK, no big deal. Things are hard right now, but you’ve got this.” Then the ground pretty much opened up underneath my family, and as this day approached I began to have serious doubts that I was going to be able to stand up here and say anything coherent. I was feeling completely at the end of my emotional rope and thought maybe even though there wasn’t really time to get someone else to take the sermon, probably anyone would be better than me. Probably it would be better to just call the whole thing off. But I’ve been alive long enough to know that sometimes God uses us best when we are clear that we have nothing to give and anything good is going to have to come from Jesus. And when I began to dig into this passage of scripture from my particular circumstances, I knew what God wanted me to say. Maybe God is already speaking to you as we read the passage and maybe the things that stood out to you are different than what stood out to me. That’s OK. That doesn’t mean we’re not hearing God right. It means that God can use the same passage of scripture in creative ways to reach us exactly where we’re at.
Most of you know that our nephew Jimmy was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer a couple of weeks ago. He moved in with us in our little one bedroom apartment. It’s been an avalanche of bad news, worse news, surgery, a little hope followed by shattered hope, confusing paperwork, long drives to appointments with so many different doctors that we’re having a hard time remembering their names, and all this as Jimmy is growing weaker and more and more ill. We’re still unsure about the full picture of what this will mean for us. And, frankly, I was tired before any of it even began.
That brings me to this passage. I’m going to dig into it a bit and as I do I’ll share what I felt God speaking to me through it.
This passage of scripture takes place when Jesus’ ministry is beginning to take off. He’s been preaching, but he’s not just preaching. He’s casting out demons and healing people. And folks are starting to notice. Jesus is attracting crowds and he’s having to solve the kinds of problems that come with those big crowds. He’s come to a place in his ministry when he can’t do it by himself anymore. He needs help.
I don’t think we often frame Jesus choosing disciples as asking for help, and it certainly wasn’t just about needing help. He was also training people who could pick up his ministry after his death and resurrection. But at least a part of choosing disciples was that Jesus either couldn’taccomplish his mission alone, or at the very least, he chooseto minister in partnership with others. On this particular day, the crowd is so large that Jesus is having a hard time finding a place to address them, (it almost sounds as if he’s getting pushed into the water) so he asks Simon if he can use his boat as a pulpit. (By the way, Jesus later renames him Peter and that’s how I’m going to refer to him for the rest of this sermon because that’s how I think of him.) So Jesus essentially asks Peter for help.
That brings me to the first thing God spoke to me through this passage. I’ll start with a confession: I hate asking for help. I want to be perfectly clear. I don’t just dislike it a little. I HATE IT WITH THE INTENSITY OF A MILLION BURNING SUNS and that might be just the teeniest, tiniest indication that something’s off. I love being the one who helps others, but when I need help, I’ll do almost anything to avoid asking for it. It’s not healthy and it’s certainly not holy. So when I realized that Jesus needed help, something began to shift in me. If Jesus needed help, maybe it’s OK for me to need help too. None of us were meant to tough it out by ourselves. One of my greatest teachers in this area is Candace Frost. When Candace is drowning in deep water and everything is falling apart, she gets on Facebook and asks for specific help. Sometimes she even asks for something as simple as a latte. This strikes me as miraculous and I want to be just like her when I grow up and stop imagining that I’m Jesus only the version of Jesus who didn’t need disciples.
Back to the passage: Peter and his buddies have been fishing all night with nothing to show for it. They’re cleaning their nets and getting ready to go home and sleep. I’m sure they’re exhausted and discouraged. I can imagine that when Jesus asks him to take him out in his boat, Peter probably felt like saying no. Maybe the reason he agreed to it is because Jesus had just healed his mother-in-law. In the previous chapter, we read that Jesus visited Peter’s home after speaking in the synagogue, and his mother-in-law was suffering from a high fever that was concerning enough for them to bring Jesus to her to see if he could help. People in those days died from fevers all the time. Jesus rebuked the fever and it left her, and she got up and began to serve him. It doesn’t really say how Peter responded to this healing, but at the very least Peter knows that Jesus is not just your average itinerate preacher. There’s something special about him. And maybe Peter even feels like he owes him something.
Peter agrees to take Jesus out just a little way off shore. After Jesus speaks to the crowds from the boat for a while, he turns to Peter and asks him to go out into the deep water and put the newly cleaned nets back into the water. How many people have ever had someone give you advice about something that you do professionally or something you know a lot about? It’s real annoying. Try to imagine what Peter in his exhausted state might have felt like getting fishing advice from a carpenter/preacher. He doesn’t want to go out into deeper water. He doesn’t want to throw his clean nets in. He doesn’t want to take fishing advice from this guy. He wants to go home and get some sleep. But after he protests about how futile this is going to be, he says, “Yet if you say so, I will let down the nets.”
This was the part of the story that spoke to me so clearly, and I think there’s something important there for all of us. Something about Jesus first asking Peter to take him just a little way off shore and then asking him to head for the deep water hit me really hard: this incremental deepening. Peter probably felt like the shallow water was already too much because of his fatigue and discouragement, but now he was being asked to row out to the deep water for something that seemed like a waste of time. All of you know what that feels like: when you’re bone tired and you find yourself not only unable to rest but being required to dig deeper and work even harder despite your exhaustion. Anyone who has had a newborn knows this feeling, and I cannot even fathom what Bonnie and Peter are experiencing with the birth of their twins. But really, all of us can call to mind experiences like this when you feel like you’re at the end of your resources and you’re being asked for even more.
But what if God is always inviting us all to deeper water all the time if we’re willing to follow him there? And what if the only way to be obedient is to remember that we can’t do it alone? What if the deep water is where all the good stuff happens?
We’re beginning this journey with Jimmy at a time when we were already tired. Less than two months ago I shared with you all that I was burning out from some relentless personal losses and a ministry role that didn’t quite fit me. As I thought about this passage of scripture and related it to my circumstances, I was basically Peter cleaning my nets and looking forward to some rest when Jimmy was diagnosed. But here we are, and Jesus seems to be asking us to head into some very very deep water. And the water that Jimmy is approaching is beyond my ability to imagine. When you find yourself in those places, sometimes it’s enough to basically say what Peter said, “well, ok, if you say so.” You don’t have to pretend it’s easy. You don’t have to fake enthusiasm. You don’t have to pretend you have more energy than you do. You don’t have to pretend that you’re not afraid. It’s enough to just show up.
And then it happens. The nets begin to break open from the weight of the fish. They call another boat over and the weight of the fish threatens to sink the boats. It’s not just a good catch. It’s a catch that none of these fishermen had ever experienced. This was a miracle that a bunch of fishermen could appreciate. It was a miracle that would nourish them and provide for their needs. It was a miracle that somehow, for Peter, was greater than the healing of his mother-in-law. And it’s a miracle that is so shocking that Peter becomes afraid. He’s suddenly aware of the kind of man he is. He says, “Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!”, and Jesus immediately reassures him and calms his fears. And just like that, Peter and James and John drop everything and follow Jesus. They leave their familiar lives behind and follow Jesus into the unknown.
I think this community knows something that many people don’t get: deep water is a holy place where we encounter the divine. It’s a place of deep intimacy. It’s a privilege to walk with people when they’re sick or depressed or desperate. Deep water is where the Holy Spirit can break the nets of what we thought was possible and weigh down our boats with God’s goodness and provision. That’s already happening for Dave and Jimmy and I. We’ve already seen the way God has shown up in the flesh and blood form of our friends. And I’m not talking about trivial things. I’m talking about astounding offers to radically share our burdens. You wouldn’t even believe it if I told you. It makes me want to weep. It makes me want to say yes. It makes me want to be humble and ask for help when I need it. It makes me aware of all of my flaws and my brokenness and sometimes it makes me afraid. It makes me want to offer my life up and follow Jesus into the unknown.
Jesus is in the boat with all of us who have found ourselves in deep water. He’s there with the words he spoke to Peter: do not be afraid.
I’m not pretending that I know what’s going to happen. I’m praying for a miracle that’s so crazy it will break nets and sink boats. But even in the middle of this terrifying place, I feel lucky to be called to this deep water. I have tons of regrets in my life, but I don’t regret one moment spent in a hospital room. I don’t regret opening our home to people who needed us. I’ll never regret sitting with someone who is desperate and sad. When we find ourselves in these deep waters, we can be assured that we’re never there alone. I’m already finding my nets broken and my boat sinking with the blessing of friendship and love.